On the eve of 2008, I thought it would only be appropriate to take a step back, reflect on the highlights of this past year -- big and small triumphs -- and choose one thing to focus on being next year.
One of the keys to setting sustainable goals is to view them as being part of our selves, the BEING, instead of assigning them an external role, the DOING. Here's an example. Say I am graduating from medical school and I set a goal of being the best doctor out there (read: my goal is to DO the role of the doctor to perfection). What if something happens that makes it impossible for me to be a doctor? All hope for my future will be crushed!
Instead, let's say that I decide upon my graduation to set my focus on helping to heal people. If something gets in the way of my being a doctor, I could still consider being an acupuncturist, a counselor, a volunteer at a center for troubled youth. There are many different ways of externally manifesting that internal attitude of healing -- and I have just set myself an achievable, fulfilling goal.
It takes a while to think about how you truly want to BE. Keep it simple, and choose to embrace that internal attitude each day when you wake up. As you do this, the attitude becomes part of your being. If you choose to make 2008 the year of joy, start by smiling. Each day, remind yourself to smile at a stranger. Sooner or later, it'll become a habit and you're going to be joyful and spreading joy without realizing it. Or, if you choose to make 2008 the year of action, start saying yes. Try something new once a week -- that new restaurant, that coffee date with the neighbor, that job interview. You might be surprised with how quickly you break out of your status quo, and how fresh life feels!
Claim 2008. Choose to have your best New Year.
Quote of the Week: “If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.” – Larry McMurtry
28 December 2007
20 December 2007
A Different Kind of Gift
Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or just enjoy the company of your family & friends during the last month of the year, the idea of gift-giving isn't far from our minds during December.
The US National Retail Federation is expecting overall holiday shopping to top $470 billion in 2007 (or, $815 per consumer), an increase of 4% over 2006 despite rising gas prices and mortgage issues. At least $30bn of that spending is expected from online shopping; according to Shop.org, 72 million Americans plan to shop via the computer this year.
What struck me was that while we're buying "stuff" to show people we care, in our increasingly busy world, maybe we're also making up for all the other times we haven't been there for them throughout the year. In addition, while I hate pushing through crowds in the mall, I realized I was isolating myself by shopping online, missing out on smiling at fellow shoppers and seeing joyful kids sitting on Santa's lap at the mall. No wonder the holidays have felt less pure as I've gotten older.
I wanted to get some of that magical sparkle back into my December so I brainstormed ways to show I care without maxing out the plastic. Looking back, I know I was touched when that super busy friend made time for a relaxed 1x1 dinner date. I loved the home-made chocolate chip cookies we got from our neighbor. I even enjoyed the old-fashioned hour-long phone call with my mother, when she listened to all of my latest updates.
So here's the not-so-secret I discovered: In this month of consumption and endless parties, some of the best memories I have, and the best gifts I have received, are actually the connection I have felt from someones time & attention. How can you show someone you care this season?
Quote of the Week: " The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention." - Richard Moss
The US National Retail Federation is expecting overall holiday shopping to top $470 billion in 2007 (or, $815 per consumer), an increase of 4% over 2006 despite rising gas prices and mortgage issues. At least $30bn of that spending is expected from online shopping; according to Shop.org, 72 million Americans plan to shop via the computer this year.
What struck me was that while we're buying "stuff" to show people we care, in our increasingly busy world, maybe we're also making up for all the other times we haven't been there for them throughout the year. In addition, while I hate pushing through crowds in the mall, I realized I was isolating myself by shopping online, missing out on smiling at fellow shoppers and seeing joyful kids sitting on Santa's lap at the mall. No wonder the holidays have felt less pure as I've gotten older.
I wanted to get some of that magical sparkle back into my December so I brainstormed ways to show I care without maxing out the plastic. Looking back, I know I was touched when that super busy friend made time for a relaxed 1x1 dinner date. I loved the home-made chocolate chip cookies we got from our neighbor. I even enjoyed the old-fashioned hour-long phone call with my mother, when she listened to all of my latest updates.
So here's the not-so-secret I discovered: In this month of consumption and endless parties, some of the best memories I have, and the best gifts I have received, are actually the connection I have felt from someones time & attention. How can you show someone you care this season?
Quote of the Week: " The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention." - Richard Moss
13 December 2007
Guilt Free
So here we are, rapidly approaching the US shipping deadlines for the holiday season, juggling the calendar to fit in holiday parties, gift shopping, card writing, and vacation planning. Have you ever stopped to figure out why, despite the exhaustion, December's schedule is still usually so much more pleasant than the same stressful busy-ness of the rest of the year?
One major reason is that we are not following arbitrary guidelines that we think others have set for us -- that guilt that leads us to do things because we think we must, should, ought to, and have to. Instead, the holidays bring on a sense of cheer and warmth and festivity, and WE CHOOSE what to do to embody that spirit.
You normally feel awful if you don't respond to emails in 5 minutes, but this month you stretch that to 24 hours because you're writing cards & sending letters to keep up with friends the old fashioned way. You don't feel guilty about spending money on gifts for your family and close friends, because you are excited to show them your thoughtfulness. You go for that extra cup of calorie-stuffed egg nog, because you are celebrating with friends. There's no law saying you must or mustn't do any of this, and you're freely following your own choices!
How would it feel to remove the word "guilt" from your motivational lexicon not just during the holidays, but through the rest of the year? How about saying yes to the things that you want to do, and then be comfortable saying no to the other things that don't fit into your absolute yes list?
Happy shopping, and happy shipping.
Quote of the Week: “Guilt is the price we pay willingly for doing what we are going to do anyway.” -- Isabelle Holland
One major reason is that we are not following arbitrary guidelines that we think others have set for us -- that guilt that leads us to do things because we think we must, should, ought to, and have to. Instead, the holidays bring on a sense of cheer and warmth and festivity, and WE CHOOSE what to do to embody that spirit.
You normally feel awful if you don't respond to emails in 5 minutes, but this month you stretch that to 24 hours because you're writing cards & sending letters to keep up with friends the old fashioned way. You don't feel guilty about spending money on gifts for your family and close friends, because you are excited to show them your thoughtfulness. You go for that extra cup of calorie-stuffed egg nog, because you are celebrating with friends. There's no law saying you must or mustn't do any of this, and you're freely following your own choices!
How would it feel to remove the word "guilt" from your motivational lexicon not just during the holidays, but through the rest of the year? How about saying yes to the things that you want to do, and then be comfortable saying no to the other things that don't fit into your absolute yes list?
Happy shopping, and happy shipping.
Quote of the Week: “Guilt is the price we pay willingly for doing what we are going to do anyway.” -- Isabelle Holland
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