Imagine the following scenarios:
You get a phenomenal promotion at work. You give your boss a cool thanks. You go home and during the course of regular conversation with your parents/significant other/friend, you just casually mention it, to keep them updated. You go to sleep and get up for work the next day.
Or,
you get a phenomenal promotion at work. You give your boss a huge smile and a strong handshake. You go home and as soon as you walk in the door you make a HUGE fist pump, shout “yeah!!” and call your parents/significant other/friend to share your excitement. You make time for a little celebration, go to sleep, and get up for work the next day.
Which way do you feel that you’ve achieved more?
It makes me wonder why we often brush our emotions under the carpet. Maybe we're too busy to take that extra moment. Maybe we think that showing emotions is a sign of weakness. On the other hand, how much strength and integrity does it take to live true to your self? Doesn’t it take courage to mourn your losses, and confidence to celebrate your achievements?
Seems to me that having a cathartic cry or a good old belly laugh connects you with the joys and sorrows that life has to bring. What a great way to reinforce how strong and alive you are!
What will you find to celebrate this week?
Quote of the Week: “Those who don’t know how to weep with their whole heart, don’t know how to laugh either.” – Golda Meir
25 October 2007
17 October 2007
Gratitude
Several of my clients noticed this week that they were fixated on the negatives in life, and that it was dragging their energy down. Seems only natural – most of us are running around putting fires out at work, only to rush home and try to manage things there as well. We’re constantly trying to fix situations and make things better.
That, though, supposes that things aren’t okay the way they are.
What if we were to flip that notion on its head, and spend one moment a day thinking about the things that ARE okay – even awesome - the way they are?
Experiment with me for the next week. Designate one particular time each day (say, when you’re brushing your teeth) to think about three things that day that you are thankful for.
Seems like it'll be good practice for Thanksgiving, so I’m excited to see if I can keep this up. For today, I’m thankful that I had some money to deposit in the bank, that I had a fun and productive meeting with a usually tough homeowners association, and that I went shopping and found blueberries that weren’t covered in mold.
Now, if only I could do something about that guy who cut me off on the way to the shop!!
Quote of the Week: “Things turn out best for people who make the best of the way things turn out.” - John Wooden
That, though, supposes that things aren’t okay the way they are.
What if we were to flip that notion on its head, and spend one moment a day thinking about the things that ARE okay – even awesome - the way they are?
Experiment with me for the next week. Designate one particular time each day (say, when you’re brushing your teeth) to think about three things that day that you are thankful for.
Seems like it'll be good practice for Thanksgiving, so I’m excited to see if I can keep this up. For today, I’m thankful that I had some money to deposit in the bank, that I had a fun and productive meeting with a usually tough homeowners association, and that I went shopping and found blueberries that weren’t covered in mold.
Now, if only I could do something about that guy who cut me off on the way to the shop!!
Quote of the Week: “Things turn out best for people who make the best of the way things turn out.” - John Wooden
10 October 2007
Community
As people grow, satisfaction with friendships and support networks can shift. For some, the person who used to be their favorite partying buddy is now a drain on their wallet. For others, the person who used to be their confidante at a previous job no longer “gets them.” It can be difficult to cut out unhealthy relationships, and it’s possible to lose sight of the support network you DO have set up around you.
One of my favorite books (Take Time for Your Life, by Cheryl Richardson) has an interesting exercise. The author asks you to take inventory of the people who are already a part of your life. If you are interested, I invite you to whip out a piece of paper and list individuals who apply to each category.
My family, or chosen family consists of:
Children I love to spend time with include:
Close friends with whom I can share my heart and soul are:
My spiritual community consists of:
My professional community includes:
Acquaintances include:
When you take a step back and look at these lists, what jumps out at you?
Do you have an abundance of names in one area but not in another? Are there relationships you’d like to have more of? Is there someone you want to bring back into your life? Is there anybody you should remove from the list? Are there people on your list with whom you’d like to connect more deeply?
This was a helpful exercise for me when we first moved to Phoenix. My husband and I did not know a single person here, and I was feeling lonely – like the move had taken me away from a huge network of close friends. When I did this exercise, I was surprised to find that I actually only had a handful of friends that I wanted to bare my soul to. What I did have was a huge network of acquaintances, some who also stimulated me in areas like my new profession and spirituality. These people were part of a well-rounded virtual community, and I was most definitely not alone. I suddenly appreciated all of the people I was keeping in touch with, and realized that what I was missing was a community to share activities with. Now, my neighbor and I go hiking every Saturday morning, I’ve found a great yoga class in the area, and we’ve found another couple to hit the local restaurants with. Without this, I might have gone on feeling like the move had cost me my closest friends!!
Quote of the Week: “Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything at all.” - Muhammad Ali
One of my favorite books (Take Time for Your Life, by Cheryl Richardson) has an interesting exercise. The author asks you to take inventory of the people who are already a part of your life. If you are interested, I invite you to whip out a piece of paper and list individuals who apply to each category.
My family, or chosen family consists of:
Children I love to spend time with include:
Close friends with whom I can share my heart and soul are:
My spiritual community consists of:
My professional community includes:
Acquaintances include:
When you take a step back and look at these lists, what jumps out at you?
Do you have an abundance of names in one area but not in another? Are there relationships you’d like to have more of? Is there someone you want to bring back into your life? Is there anybody you should remove from the list? Are there people on your list with whom you’d like to connect more deeply?
This was a helpful exercise for me when we first moved to Phoenix. My husband and I did not know a single person here, and I was feeling lonely – like the move had taken me away from a huge network of close friends. When I did this exercise, I was surprised to find that I actually only had a handful of friends that I wanted to bare my soul to. What I did have was a huge network of acquaintances, some who also stimulated me in areas like my new profession and spirituality. These people were part of a well-rounded virtual community, and I was most definitely not alone. I suddenly appreciated all of the people I was keeping in touch with, and realized that what I was missing was a community to share activities with. Now, my neighbor and I go hiking every Saturday morning, I’ve found a great yoga class in the area, and we’ve found another couple to hit the local restaurants with. Without this, I might have gone on feeling like the move had cost me my closest friends!!
Quote of the Week: “Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything at all.” - Muhammad Ali
02 October 2007
Support
My husband is training for the Phoenix marathon, something I would never in a million years do myself. In the spirit of pom-pom wielding cheerleader, I looked into what I could do to support him.
In my searches, I came across a tremendously inspiring father-son duo, Team Hoyt. Together, Dick and Rick have completed 216 triathalons, 65 marathons, 81 half marathons, and biked and run across the US in 45 consecutive days -- all with exceptional personal best times.
These numbers are all the more amazing when you consider that Rick can’t walk or talk. Using his interactive computer, Rick once asked his father if they could enter a five mile benefit run for a paralyzed sports player. Afterwards, Rick told his father he didn’t feel handicapped when they were competing.
To help Rick continue his athletic achievements, Dick Hoyt has dedicated himself to pushing and pulling his son across hundreds of finish lines. In return, Rick’s humor, love of sports and competition keeps his father going.
We all need a community of people to help us reach our goals. More often than not, the support goes both ways.
Check out this inspiring 4-minute video, see past the religious music, and try not to cry: www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gm7XwtIJdM
Then think about the following:
* In what ways do others support and inspire you in reaching your goals?
* What are you doing right now to support someone else?
In my searches, I came across a tremendously inspiring father-son duo, Team Hoyt. Together, Dick and Rick have completed 216 triathalons, 65 marathons, 81 half marathons, and biked and run across the US in 45 consecutive days -- all with exceptional personal best times.
These numbers are all the more amazing when you consider that Rick can’t walk or talk. Using his interactive computer, Rick once asked his father if they could enter a five mile benefit run for a paralyzed sports player. Afterwards, Rick told his father he didn’t feel handicapped when they were competing.
To help Rick continue his athletic achievements, Dick Hoyt has dedicated himself to pushing and pulling his son across hundreds of finish lines. In return, Rick’s humor, love of sports and competition keeps his father going.
We all need a community of people to help us reach our goals. More often than not, the support goes both ways.
Check out this inspiring 4-minute video, see past the religious music, and try not to cry: www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gm7XwtIJdM
Then think about the following:
* In what ways do others support and inspire you in reaching your goals?
* What are you doing right now to support someone else?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)